Feasgar Math   Good Evening  

 We  thank you laddies here tonight,

For your truly amazing and inspiring insight.

It reassures us to know that you know us so well,

Better than we know ourselves. We can tell.

We understand why you listen with  at most half an ear,

 And only say the right thing, at a push,  thrice a year.

For you laddies, since birth, a  burden have borne.

But as Rabbie said – “Man Was Made To Mourn.”

We commend you laddies for New Years day. 

When the Loony Dook got on its way.

Likes Sentinels of yore you swarmed the harbour,

Tapping your toes in a danse macabre.

 Then, as the Easdale  lassies like sea nymphs frolicked,

You laddies cupped your frozen… fingers.

Your lips turned blue. Your  extremities shrunk,

And still the  lassies  dipped and dunked.

But hats off to you laddies, because there were none more  brave,

Than you laddies keeping look out, for a wee lassie to save.  

You laddies are Men For All Seasons. A well-seasoned  bunch.

Like a smooth single malt, with a peaty  punch.

There’s:

Lee the Scribe

And Dave the Trumpet

Warrior Will

And… THE CRUMPET!

There’s:

Kyle the DOC

And axe man  Stu

Allen the Pipes

To name but a few.

Laddies,  broad in shoulder. Hips narrow.

The Easdale  Chippendale’s, wheeling barrows.

With biceps bulging and buttocks toned,

Toiling many a tortuous journey home…